I want to remember what it’s like to put Max to bed right now. Time seems to speed up faster and faster. I heard a theory that that happens because when you are 10, 1 year is only a tenth of your life (remember when one year seemed to go on and on forever…not in a bad way, just in a it’s still 3 whole days until Christmas kind of way) and when you are 50 it’s only a 50th of your life, so five years at 50 would feel the same length as 1 year at ten….anyways…. There is so much I forget that I want to freeze in my brain.
Right now we have to convince Max to sleep in his own room, unless it’s a weekend then they can all sleep together. He’s convinced there is a nightmare living in his closet….I told him to say a prayer and Jesus would help him feel better. One night he screamed for me and with tears running down his face said, “I said a prayer and Jesus didn’t COME!” whoops. Guess I should have explained a little better…
We tell him that he has to go pee, everyone must pee before they go to bed. He usually pretends nothing will come out… until he can’t hold it anymore, then he acts amazed, raises his eyebrows and gives me a sheepish half smile.
We read a book.
I do remember that I used to read Josh 2 or 3 books and sing him a bunch of songs. Poor 3rd child…
We read 1 book…. with me skipping lots of pages and words because he wants to read them same book about 1000 times in a row before we move on.
Then we sing the Lullaby song and Twinkle Star. My other kids would mix up their song picks. Not this one. Same songs, same order. Sometimes we sing Twinkle Star in a different tune with crazy voices, but that’s all the variation he goes for.
Usually I lie down by him while we sing. He likes to sing with his eyes closed and his little baby voice and facial expression cracks me up. I usually stare at him while we sing. I don’t sing to him. He always participates.
Then I kiss him goodnight. As I’m leaving I hear,
“I need a drink” – why do I never remember that before?
followed by, “Leave the door a little bit open, no a lot a bit open, no this much” – showing me with his hands
Followed by, “Leave the closet light on.”
Followed by, “I need hugs and kisses!”
By then I’m usually completely exasperated, but occasionally I really try to enjoy those chubby arms wrapped so tightly around my neck. And memorize that little face that is so completely him.