Peace – Freedom from disturbance, quiet, tranquility;
I like all these definitions, but none of them were quiet what I was going for. My home isn’t always a quiet calm place, and I don’t want it to be… then it hit me: really to me, peace is the absence of stress.
Sometimes life gets unrealistic. The week before a holiday always seems to be right up there.
There are parties to go to.
This conversation may have happened this evening:
“Umm are we out of toilet paper?”
“It’s a possibility” thinking and I won’t have time to go to the store for 3 more days…. hopefully there are some baby wipes under Max’s bed to get us through. Cue search for baby wipes, tissues and napkins to stock the bathrooms with.
I recently heard a song on the radio called something along the lines of “things Moms say in a 24 hours period.” Things like, brush your teeth, don’t forget your lunch, put that away, if I have to ask you one more time…., do your homework, do your reading.
It bothered me. I say all those things, pretty much everyday. It wasn’t a peaceful song. It made me wonder, do I help others around me, my children, my husband, my friends, random strangers, feel more peace? or do I up other people’s anxiety? Do I feel peace?
Lately, I have been putting pressure on myself. Reaching for my own goals, striving to be better, to develop me talents, while not dropping the ball anywhere else.
I’ve discovered peace is about priorities. We’ve gotten busier as my kids have gotten older. Hypothetically I should have more time to work on personal goals,with two of them gone all day, and I do – and I don’t.
My personal priorities are: my relationship with God, a house that’s in order, connecting with each member of my family every day, a healthy body, and my recent personal goals. These are the things I do first, or should do first if I want to feel peace.
These priorities ebb and flow daily. Sometimes through my relationship with God, I will feel like I need to bag an orderly house for the day and go serve a friend.
But there are some things that can go. Some social activities, PTO, a garden, being in charge of any event – (That is the epitome of stress to me)
Tweaking of family responsibilities and priorities is required for each season. Josh can do this, Anna can do that, even Max can do something. We just tweaked our daily and weekly chore lists and it has provided more peace. No routine is static.
Realistic expectations everyday are also key. When all three of my kids were home all day, I remember telling my Mom, I try and do one thing a day in addition to feeding everyone. Now I can up my game a little bit – but not too much.
We are practicing peace. In a recent church lesson someone said, “If you are having a power struggle with a child, determine if it is something that will affect them long term, if it won’t let it go.” Love it!
Peace is illusive, but possible.