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Real Life Real Joy

Five Thoughts On a Friday – A Family Quote Board

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It’s not much. Just sticky notes stuck to our pantry door – But it serves two important tasks:

It makes us laugh and….

Helps us remember.

Not to get too philosophical about a bunch of sticky notes full of the dumb and ridiculous things we say – but….laughing with someone creates a connection – a happy one, and that’s not a little thing.

And some of the things we say are just so US. I can read a quote, even one that I wasn’t in the room for, and know exactly who said it, and when.

So here are five favorites:

  1. “Dear Heavenly Father, Thank you for my tent.” Big Pause. Opens eyes. “Wait! He didn’t give me my tent. Santa did!”
  2. “I’m trying to memorize Pi to the 39th power so I can calculate the mass of the known universe.” – because of course you are…
  3. While listening to a song about values…
    Song – “Values are something you can’t touch – ”
    Child “Like a poisonous frog! You should never touch a poisonous frog!”
  4. “Don’t I look like an old person wearing a cactus?”
  5. “What is this thing called future I keep hearing about?”

If you need an easy family tradition, grab some sticky notes.

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Five Thoughts on A Friday – Being Present

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My word for the year is PRESENT. For more about that you can go here: http://bit.ly/36wtLzo

Before I’ve focused on ways of being (LISTEN, HONEST) – which, while life changing, left out my body. I was surprised to discover that being present involves my whole self; my mind, my spirit and my body. All need to be present, and all benefit from the effort required.

  1. As I have tried to quiet my mind this week, I have become more aware of how loud it really is. I can read an entire book to my kids and have no memory of reading some of the pages (sometimes this is a blessing – those Disney books are LONG). I am often thinking about something else while talking to one of my children, while cleaning, while doing… anything. It’s rare that I’m just there, in the moment. But the times that I am, those are the times that stick in my memory…. The other day, AJ reached his arms up to me to be held. I picked him up and he wrapped his legs around my stomach, his arms around my neck and nestled his head against my shoulders. I sat down and paid attention to what he looked like, how he felt, his little body as wiry as a monkey. I probably can’t tell you anything else that happened that day, but I remember that, because I stopped and lived it.

Continue Reading

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Things I Forgot To Tell Them….Part 2

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I often forget to tell my kids key information.

Last week, I was sitting in church with a child on every limb. One, with his head in my lap, another leaning against my shoulder and one climbing up my leg.

I closed my eyes and tried to focus, wanting a brief moment of stillness. The child at my feet tapped me and waved a book in my face. “Mom, will you read this to me?”

I opened my eyes. “Sure, in a minute I want to talk to Jesus really quick.”

The child looked around, eyes wide “Is her here?”

I smile at him. “No, I just mean in my heart.”

“How?”

And I realize, my two-year old used to say fantastic, very untraditional prayers. He would look around and name everything that he loved.Continue Reading

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Five Thoughts on a Friday – Marriage and Kids

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  1. Feelings. Kids have powerful feelings in little bodies. AJ has been very opinionated and independent and tantrumy lately. Basically, a two-year- old. My sister suggested giving him names for his feelings. So now AJ bows his head and slumps his shoulders at least ten times a day, says, “I’m sad”. And refuses to move…. But at least he can name it and at least he’s not screaming.
  2. Marriage and change. We are in many ways completely different people than we were when we got married. Sometimes, it frustrates me. Change stresses me out, especially when it’s not planned changed and when it’s not me that has changed. And then I remember, that I, the girl who asked for a hope chest for graduation (my parents wanted to give me a laptop), the one who dropped out of graduate school to have a baby, who wanted nothing more than to be a homemaker, is letting the house go, and doing whatever she can to outsource and streamline cooking, to chase the dream of becoming a published writer. I remember that my husband is going in to work 2 hours later than normal two days a week to help me chase that dream. Motherhood still brings me amazing joy and fulfillment, homemaking less so:) Change is uncomfortable and needed and just always there.
  3. Marriage and sameness. In many ways we are the exact same people we were when we got married. I still am extremely sensitive to violence, sex and language on TV. Several years ago, Justin convinced me to watch the TV version of The Patriot,  I made it a half hour in before I was bawling uncontrollably and we turned it off. Justin’s more accepting of this quirk than he was when we got married. Last week when I apologized for not wanting to watch something he just said, “I love you, don’t worry about it.” We can’t ask each other to change or to stay the same. We just are.
  4. Sports: This is my favorite sports season. Basketball and soccer tournaments. I am still amazed at how much I love watching my kids play, and how much I care about the outcome. Sports have never been my thing. But watching my kids try so hard, learn so much, and be so brave, it’s awesome. I still have never yelled at a ref, but I’m no longer putting it out of the range of possibility.
  5. Love and Fear: I want to teach my kids to deal with fear in healthy ways. Lately I have been studying fear in the scriptures. It has many meanings there, being scared, awe….The scripture that keeps sticking in my mind is “Perfect love casteth out all fear.” Beautiful. I’ve often heard that we are either acting out of love, or out of fear. But then I stopped. Love of what? Perfect love for my kids only makes me more scared. I have more to lose. No, it has to be love of something else, something bigger, greater, expansive and inclusive of us all.

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